Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Wake Up Alone

Its ok in the day
I'm staying busy
Tied up enough so I don't have to wonder where is he,
Got so sick of crying,
So just lately,
When I catch myself I do a 180.
I stay up clean the house; at least I'm not drinking,
Run around just so I don't have to think about thinking,
That silence sense of content that everyone gets,
Just disappears soon as the sunsets.

He gets fierce in my dreams seizing my guts,
He floors me with dread.
Soaked to soul he swims in my eyes by the bed.
Pour myself over him,
Moon spilling in,
And I wake up alone.

Regardless my heart,
I'd rather be restless.
Second I stop the sleep catches up and I'm breathless.
This ache in my chest,
'Cause my day is done now.
The dark covers me and I cannot run now.
My blood running cold,
I stand before him.
It"s all I can do to assure him,
When he comes to me,
I drip for him tonight,
Drowning in me we bathe under blue light.

He is fierce in my dreams seizing my guts,
He floods me with dread.
Soaked to his soul, he swims in my eyes by the bed.
Pour myself over him,
Moon spilling in,
And I wake up alone.
And I wake up....alone...

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julie said...

Hi Shari,

A long time lurker here, but I finally feel like I need to comment. I'm not sure how I found your blog, but have really enjoyed reading.

I hope you know that there are so many people out here that wish you all the best. Pray, meditate, cling to those you love, and know that these hard times for you will end. My hear hurts for you, but know that you are a strong woman, and will get through this.

I wish you nothing but the best.


Bonnie said...

Shari I am so sorry you are in such pain.

I can see the light shining in you.

You deserve good things--my heart goes out to you.

Aimee said...

Aside from the terrible things I can say, which you already know, and the motivational things I can say, which I already have said, and all the other stuff currently hurricaning through your life, which we already talked about...
You look beautiful in this picture! what kind of mascara are you wearing??? your eyelashes look a mile long and perfect!

Shari Baby said...

OMG...you are too funny. I use this product called Amazing Lash and it grows your lashes to crazy lengths. This pic is old...youll trip on my spider eyes now....!!

Shari Baby said...

Julie and Bonnie,

Thank you so much for your support. I swear this is one of the hardest things I have ever gione through. I have never ever been cheated on or lied to or decieved like this so I don't know how to handle it. I am crushed...completely broken hearted. But I am going out this weekend and I am looking forward to having some fun. I got some new amazing heels and a beautiful little outfit....I'm ready!!